Two Heads Are Funnier Than One

Here's a survey Keri and I completed last night called "Complete the Sentence". We each answered individually.

1) My ex...
Keri- Has a REALLY ugly girlfriend. I'm not just saying that because I'm bitter. We're talkin elephant-like legs and balding.
Ashley- Likes boys but won't admit it to me.

2) Maybe I should...
Keri- Be less critical of fat, balding individuals. Ah hell, she's ugly.
Ashley- Shower more often.

3) I love...
Keri- Being sexy.
Ashley- Food. All the time.

4) When I wake up in the morning...
Keri- I'm lookin like a lion.
Ashley- I'm wishing my company was the victim of a freak electrical fire so I wouldn't have to go to work EVER.

5) I lost...
Keri- This should just say "I am lost" because I really always don't know where I am/going.
Ashley- I lost...all respect for...who have I lost respect for?
Keri- There's gotta be someone. Lindsay Lohan? She's a screw up.
Ashley- Never had respect for her.
Keri- What a lez.

6) Life is full of...
Keri- Shady ass mofosss.
Ashley- Chocolates. Oh, wait. That's life is like a box of chocolates.
Keri- I watched that movie the other night! It changed my LIFE! I'm dropping out of college to be a shrimper for Bubba's sake.
Ashley-Bubba's dead.
Keri- Harsh.

7) My past is...
Ashley- Pretty boring if we're being honest.
Keri- Sad. I can't think of anything either.

8) I get annoyed with...
Keri-EVERYTHING. I'm PMSing hardcore and I hate everything living and breathing.
Ashley- That is a loaded question. I'm pretty much annoyed by everything. How about what I'm annoyed with this month? When my boss leaves people on hold for more than 5 minutes, when people have southern accents, when people don't know how to cook, when people don't eat veggies because they "dont like them", don't get me started.

9) If I had a million dollars...
Ashley-I'd give it to my parents.
Keri-That's really nice of you. I was thinking I would buy myself a yacht.
Ashley-...After I paid off my debts. That would leave them about $500.